Am I doing well in life?
Does this question not bother you? Don't you ever wonder? I do from time to time.
I really do.
Though more often than not, I'm happy being me, happy and satisfied really, but there are times I'm perturbed greatly by this question. Am I being the best of what I can be?
One of my earliest memories is of being told never to compare. I remember being told to focus on improving myself instead of measuring success on a scale relative to others. This had so much of an affect on me that all through my life, I have more or less never looked at others to evaluate myself.
Having said that, there have certainly been times when I failed to adhere to this philosophy. There have been times when someone else's success touched a chord in a whole different way. A bad, self-pity kind of way.
Who decides if we are doing well in life?
Am I not good enough? Why can't I get things easily like others do? Why, oh why not me?
I have heard myself ask these questions sometimes.
The interesting thing here is, I started losing the plot of being happy and content with myself as I grew older. But on the whole, I think I have managed well.
Success is living your life your way and being happy doing so.
Whether my crooked front teeth or my perineal aversion to doing all things young people generally do, I have been comfortable not following the herd. Peer pressure was never a bother to me. Saying what I believe, not pretending to be holier than thou or just being myself, have been some of the things I have always liked about the reflection I saw in the mirror. Being happy in what I have, what I do and not be in a rush to prove something, has been my own way of living life so far.
Positive affirmations are always good for the soul.
But of late, I have been plagued by a doubt. Am I wasting away my life by being ordinary?
More often than not the answer is reassuring. Being ordinary or mediocrity is good. And who measures these and against what scales?
I'm happy and blessed in so many ways and that's what matters most. Isn't it? That is my success.
Do I wish for more? Do I have plans?
Yes, I do.
I have some plans and some dreams. Some clear, some vague. Some fixed, some changing. I do, like everyone out there. Hard work, grit, consistency and some luck would decide if they ever come true. Meanwhile, though, I need to remember all the good things in my life and not delve on what might have been. Or, not get affected by what someone else may or may not be doing.
I need to live my life, my way. That's what I'm here for, isn't it?
So, yes, I'm doing well in life and I need to keep telling myself that, at the same time also encourage myself to do better. The scale always having various versions of me.
I'm loved, I'm happy and I'm doing well in life.
Your turn now. Are you doing well in life?