I've Changed...Have You?

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My family always says looking at my pictures that my face hasn't changed a bit. My face, the way I look, is the same it seems. At-least that's what they say.

When I look at myself in the mirror I still see that unruly curly hair that I had as a school girl. Maybe that is what makes me look the same to people who have known me forever. It’s like the same face has gotten slightly bigger, wider while everything else has remained stagnant. Except for the height and some bodily changes that come as each year passes by. They find it amusing to think that I’ll be 100 and still have the same face only no teeth with lots and lots of wrinkles. Funny how the silliest of things makes one laugh!

I had always thought that I’d look different in different phases of my life. You know what I mean? Like they show in movies. A person should look nothing like his or her younger self as time passes by. I had dreams that my face would change and my hair would finally begin listening to my comb’s commands. As far as I know I’m as grown up as grown up can be. Then I see myself and it’s true I still have the same face. The face I have been looking at for years now still stares back at me. And I have the same unmanageable hair too. But if nothing has changed why do I feel like a different person myself?

Yes, I know what you are thinking. And believe me you and I are on the same page. The face might not go through too much change except for aging which is inevitable. But the person inside does. Evolves is the right word perhaps. I know I’m not the same girl that I was once. And I’m sure you are not too.

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Each day and each experience has changed me in ways that I cannot quite articulate. Good and bad both. People, events and books have left impressions on me. There was a time when I was naïve. I trusted people too easily. Now that part of me is nowhere to be found. Growing up does that to you. I’m bitter too. Yes, I admit it because people have hurt me in ways I never believed was possible. But I’ve also found that I have this buried strength to get over such betrayals. It has only grown with time. Change. Yes, like the extreme ends between which a pendulum swings I have seen myself transform. I’m not the same person I was a year back or even who I was a few months back.

Has it made me a better person? I don’t know. Do I like this version of myself? I think yes. Keeping the quirks aside I think I’ve changed to become a stronger person. Stronger than I was once. And change even if not visible is always nice. Don’t you think?

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