In a sudden turn of events the
vegetable fraternity has today filed a defamation suit against the poor of this
country. This drastic step was taken after careful consideration by the
Vegetable Board of Directors in a meeting chaired by their current CEO, Mr. Biter
Gourd.
Experts are of the opinion that
this step was a direct result of the increase in affordability of vegetables,
which had considerably tarnished the reputation of the latter.
One would have thought that with
the Government promptly coming to the rescue of the vegetable community by
increasing their prices, the matter would be resolved without a libel suit. But
the spokesperson of the Vegetable Board of Directors, Mr. Potato, speaking to
the press cited that the mental trauma suffered by them had to be compensated for
and hence the lawsuit.
An eggplant believed to be a close
aid of Mr. Biter Gourd in a conversation with the press said that the balance
of their lives had been completely shattered. He reminisced how till a few
months ago only a meager few of them would have made their way to the cooking vessels
of the Poor. Those were the good times he said, for the rest enjoyed nonstick
cookware and olive oils. But off late the malicious underprivileged section of
the society has been taking more of the vegetable fraternity to their chopping-boards.
He added that this has lowered the quality of life of the Vegetables
considerably. Hence, the time had come to seek monetary compensation. He further
went on to add that it was a question of tradition;
the poor being unable to afford vegetables, and that had to be protected at any
cost.
The Government on the other hand
welcomed the decision by the Vegetables adding that all efforts would be made
to ensure that just like the other basic necessities of life; vegetables too
would be made exorbitant for the poor. The Vegetables have been reassured by
various parties as well that their prices would keep rising and the status quo
that has existed for decades would not be disturbed.
The law firm representing the poor
however have hit back saying that the facts have been misconstrued for the
affordability of vegetables when it comes to the poor had never changed. He
blamed that this is propaganda by the Rich Opposition party who lobbied with
the Non-Veg Fraternity to cause the rift between long term partners the Poor and the Vegetables.
But with the Indian Vegetables
completely boycotting the poor, the latter has now sought interim relief from
the Chinese Vegetable Board while the prices of the former continue to rise.
